Before I begin, I would like to specify that this concerns a personal matter. It is in fact something that has happened to me recently and that gave me another important life lesson. One I thought I knew but soon came to realize there is a world of difference between saying you know something and actually having the knowledge of it.
I won't go into detail just to protect the other person's name, but I will say this: even though sometimes we may be older than others, that doesn't really say anything about us. Yes, we are supposed to act more mature and more responsible, but life is so unpredictable that you just don't know what's waiting for you around the corner.
So yes, this does indeed involve me and another person of a somewhat younger age. A much younger age actually. Not that that has anything to do with it, just to throw some salt on the wound. A few years back, during some classes I was taking (and let me tell you, I've been taking those classes seriously and vigorously), I came across a couple of children of a higher level than I was. And, along with everyone else in those classes, even though we competed, we started to learn more about each other and become friends. I began to make other friends in these classes as well. Until I felt part of one big family. And you know how it goes with families, some people you're closer with, others you're not, but they're all there. And you subconsciously miss them if they're not. This is kinda what I began to feel in time.
Along that big family came those two children of the same age. Twins, I think. One boy, one girl. They showed me a lot of respect for the effort I was putting into these classes and they were growing quite fond of me. It gave me some confidence as well. That if others are believing in me, then I should believe in myself a bit more. I felt capable, stronger. All because of a pat on the back, a joke or a "good work!". (You wouldn't believe how far a little recognition can get you!) And I was responding to it, of course. Trying to give back the strength they had given me. Not just them, but everyone. I felt great at that time!
But, as they say, it was just the calm before the storm. During one of our exams for these classes, I found out something that I just thought was too hard to accept. This man, this horrible person, and one of the people responsible for countless futures lost, unimaginable tragedies, suicides, poverty, so many others suffering (and I could go on for a while), this guy had come to see our exams! The reason? To watch his two children, the ones that were spurring me on and pushing me forward, the ones that I considered my friends and part of my new family! I passed the exam, but it didn't even matter to me. I felt angry, bitter! I didn't know what to believe anymore. I quickly tried to erase them from everywhere (Facebook, my life, etc.) and not have anything to do with them.
Some sound advice and some days to think made me realize that this was a big mistake. It didn't matter where they came from, all that mattered was who they were. That's what everyone around me said when I asked them. It wasn't their fault that they were born there. I tried to accept that, I tried to understand that they were too young to comprehend anything that's going on around them, to imagine the difficult life they must have because of who their father is and just forget about the whole thing... But the damage was already done. On both sides...
Deleting someone from your facebook profile and then sending them a friend request two days later always raises questions. So you can imagine that I was asked about it when I did it. And, as a loyal fan of speaking my mind, I told the young girl everything when she asked me. What I got in return for my honesty was viciousness, mean looks, and not a single word out of her mouth for about four months now. I don't blame her really... "I-didn't-know-who-you-were-so-then-I-hated-you-for-it-but-now-I-changed-my-mind-and-I-like-you-again...", sounds kind of a lame excuse. But also, she was kinda hurt because she thought she had found a friend in me.
Since then I've been having a bit of a mental torment. This especially cannot be helped when you have nothing to do, so you sit around thinking about stuff. On the one hand, I have the children of a man because of who I and many others are without a job, without money, without dreams. I've ended up hating this country because of the likes of him and I'm forced to leave. And those kids have a great life thanks to all the sacrifices that our people were forced to make! We weren't even asked about it! (Even though the people are as much to blame for this situation as the politicians, but I think I've analyzed that in a different post).
On the other hand though, there's two great personalities, two fun kids that have never acted like they're higher above anyone. That have worked their butts off to prove that they're not just daddy's little kids, but something on their own. That have had to carry a burden since birth of about 9,5 million people cursing their father's, or even their whole family's name. And yet, even at such a young age they have the courage and the maturity to realize it and turn the other cheek, to smile at their hardships, to be kind, polite, happy and independent.
It took me a while but I understood that I don't have the right to even look at that little girl anymore. I had ten years on her and yet, she made me look like a ten-year-old. I hurt her feelings but her maturity in handling the situation made me mad at first, so mad in fact that I even held a grudge. I was being foolish. The lesson I got from that 15-year-old girl was that it doesn't matter if a person is born in an alley or in Buckingham Palace. All that matters is what's inside of them.
Yes, her father was yet again last night (one of the ones) responsible for who knows how many people to lose their jobs and get little to no compensation for it. Yes, I was mad, like the rest of this country. But that's another story, for another topic. A lesson hard learned.
For what it's worth, and if you ever read this, I'm sorry...
I won't go into detail just to protect the other person's name, but I will say this: even though sometimes we may be older than others, that doesn't really say anything about us. Yes, we are supposed to act more mature and more responsible, but life is so unpredictable that you just don't know what's waiting for you around the corner.
So yes, this does indeed involve me and another person of a somewhat younger age. A much younger age actually. Not that that has anything to do with it, just to throw some salt on the wound. A few years back, during some classes I was taking (and let me tell you, I've been taking those classes seriously and vigorously), I came across a couple of children of a higher level than I was. And, along with everyone else in those classes, even though we competed, we started to learn more about each other and become friends. I began to make other friends in these classes as well. Until I felt part of one big family. And you know how it goes with families, some people you're closer with, others you're not, but they're all there. And you subconsciously miss them if they're not. This is kinda what I began to feel in time.
Along that big family came those two children of the same age. Twins, I think. One boy, one girl. They showed me a lot of respect for the effort I was putting into these classes and they were growing quite fond of me. It gave me some confidence as well. That if others are believing in me, then I should believe in myself a bit more. I felt capable, stronger. All because of a pat on the back, a joke or a "good work!". (You wouldn't believe how far a little recognition can get you!) And I was responding to it, of course. Trying to give back the strength they had given me. Not just them, but everyone. I felt great at that time!
But, as they say, it was just the calm before the storm. During one of our exams for these classes, I found out something that I just thought was too hard to accept. This man, this horrible person, and one of the people responsible for countless futures lost, unimaginable tragedies, suicides, poverty, so many others suffering (and I could go on for a while), this guy had come to see our exams! The reason? To watch his two children, the ones that were spurring me on and pushing me forward, the ones that I considered my friends and part of my new family! I passed the exam, but it didn't even matter to me. I felt angry, bitter! I didn't know what to believe anymore. I quickly tried to erase them from everywhere (Facebook, my life, etc.) and not have anything to do with them.
Some sound advice and some days to think made me realize that this was a big mistake. It didn't matter where they came from, all that mattered was who they were. That's what everyone around me said when I asked them. It wasn't their fault that they were born there. I tried to accept that, I tried to understand that they were too young to comprehend anything that's going on around them, to imagine the difficult life they must have because of who their father is and just forget about the whole thing... But the damage was already done. On both sides...
Deleting someone from your facebook profile and then sending them a friend request two days later always raises questions. So you can imagine that I was asked about it when I did it. And, as a loyal fan of speaking my mind, I told the young girl everything when she asked me. What I got in return for my honesty was viciousness, mean looks, and not a single word out of her mouth for about four months now. I don't blame her really... "I-didn't-know-who-you-were-so-then-I-hated-you-for-it-but-now-I-changed-my-mind-and-I-like-you-again...", sounds kind of a lame excuse. But also, she was kinda hurt because she thought she had found a friend in me.
Since then I've been having a bit of a mental torment. This especially cannot be helped when you have nothing to do, so you sit around thinking about stuff. On the one hand, I have the children of a man because of who I and many others are without a job, without money, without dreams. I've ended up hating this country because of the likes of him and I'm forced to leave. And those kids have a great life thanks to all the sacrifices that our people were forced to make! We weren't even asked about it! (Even though the people are as much to blame for this situation as the politicians, but I think I've analyzed that in a different post).
On the other hand though, there's two great personalities, two fun kids that have never acted like they're higher above anyone. That have worked their butts off to prove that they're not just daddy's little kids, but something on their own. That have had to carry a burden since birth of about 9,5 million people cursing their father's, or even their whole family's name. And yet, even at such a young age they have the courage and the maturity to realize it and turn the other cheek, to smile at their hardships, to be kind, polite, happy and independent.
It took me a while but I understood that I don't have the right to even look at that little girl anymore. I had ten years on her and yet, she made me look like a ten-year-old. I hurt her feelings but her maturity in handling the situation made me mad at first, so mad in fact that I even held a grudge. I was being foolish. The lesson I got from that 15-year-old girl was that it doesn't matter if a person is born in an alley or in Buckingham Palace. All that matters is what's inside of them.
Yes, her father was yet again last night (one of the ones) responsible for who knows how many people to lose their jobs and get little to no compensation for it. Yes, I was mad, like the rest of this country. But that's another story, for another topic. A lesson hard learned.
For what it's worth, and if you ever read this, I'm sorry...
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