Sitting in my room for the last night, since tomorrow I'll be moving once again and it'll probably take about a month to have a solid internet connection, I decided I should bid it farewell with one final post. It seems appropriate after all, since this was the room my blog was originally born in. And I don't know how many readers I have or I will have, but this is one more milestone in my life and when yet another door closes for the last time, so will that chapter with it.
So, what is the topic of this final post (final from this room, let's not be misunderstood! There will be plenty more to come, I assure you.)? I have been pondering recently about the thin line between love and hatred. What is it that could lead people to do vicious things? What's the difference between those impulses and the ones that make us do things for other people? Is it really just as simple as "our feelings got hurt"?
Let's take a look at love first. When someone is in love, or lives a life that is surrounded by love in general, he tends to be caring about others, unselfish, sometimes a little spoiled but a good person all around. Sure, one might argue that if these people are smothered by love they might eventually begin to take other people for granted, but if they grow up with the right principles or if people care about them enough, they eventually get it right. These people are usually fun to be around.
What about people that grew up neglected, not truly knowing what love is? Not having a parental arm to lean on when things got tough? Well, these people are forced to mature faster and figure out life's answers for themselves. They tend to be harder to approach, but eventually it could be that these people grow to be successful. Since they're forced from a young age to fend for themselves, they become survivors of life and learn all it's tricks. So, in the long run, a lot of these people might actually work a lot and have a good life in their adulthood. Sure, they may be a little closed-up emotionally, but it's these people that are true with their feelings, since they rarely open up to others because they're afraid of losing them.
And what would happen if the two were intertwined? If, for instance, a person that never knew love in his life and was always snubbed and put to the side eventually found a person or a few people that truly love him for who he is and nothing else? And vice versa: if someone who grew being smothered with love, only to have it all ripped away from him and realize that no one really cares about him at all.
Well, the first circumstance is a bit complicated. For a person that never knew positive feelings to have to deal with a whole bunch of them all at once is overwhelming. That person could push the people away at first with his character, even unbeknownst to him. But, eventually he learns to cope with his inner turmoil and becomes easier to deal with over time.
The second situation is known as true despair. It's very difficult for a person that has known love to embrace his loneliness. It can very easily turn to hate. This is the situation that gives rise to criminals. A person that is caught up in loneliness latches onto anything he can find, good or bad. The more he stays in solitude, the more he begins to despise other people that have what he doesn't: happiness. He becomes less and less sociable until eventually he either shuts everyone out or gets shut out by everyone. And being alone all of a sudden can lead down very dark paths.
Now, obviously, no one is totally alone. But most of us take others for granted. Like, in that last case, people will rarely take their family into account, considering that family is always there. Although others didn't even have that when they were young. Others don't have mothers, others have no fathers, and so on. But, if a person that grew up being loved and then ended up having that love taken away from him, he wouldn't stop to think about the people in his life. Just his own deprived-of-love self. But, if someone that had known little love in his life and ended up losing it, he would consider the rest of the people in his life, so that they don't go through what he went through.
I'm not sure if I'm making a whole lot of sense here, but what my point is, with the way things are in this day and age, love is doing more damage than good. Spoiling people, smothering them, then making them depressed and even bad. People that never experienced a lot of love are better off in the long run since they have less emotional attachments and are more focused on their goals. And despite how awful it sounds, without love there would be better people.
So, what is the topic of this final post (final from this room, let's not be misunderstood! There will be plenty more to come, I assure you.)? I have been pondering recently about the thin line between love and hatred. What is it that could lead people to do vicious things? What's the difference between those impulses and the ones that make us do things for other people? Is it really just as simple as "our feelings got hurt"?
Let's take a look at love first. When someone is in love, or lives a life that is surrounded by love in general, he tends to be caring about others, unselfish, sometimes a little spoiled but a good person all around. Sure, one might argue that if these people are smothered by love they might eventually begin to take other people for granted, but if they grow up with the right principles or if people care about them enough, they eventually get it right. These people are usually fun to be around.
What about people that grew up neglected, not truly knowing what love is? Not having a parental arm to lean on when things got tough? Well, these people are forced to mature faster and figure out life's answers for themselves. They tend to be harder to approach, but eventually it could be that these people grow to be successful. Since they're forced from a young age to fend for themselves, they become survivors of life and learn all it's tricks. So, in the long run, a lot of these people might actually work a lot and have a good life in their adulthood. Sure, they may be a little closed-up emotionally, but it's these people that are true with their feelings, since they rarely open up to others because they're afraid of losing them.
And what would happen if the two were intertwined? If, for instance, a person that never knew love in his life and was always snubbed and put to the side eventually found a person or a few people that truly love him for who he is and nothing else? And vice versa: if someone who grew being smothered with love, only to have it all ripped away from him and realize that no one really cares about him at all.
Well, the first circumstance is a bit complicated. For a person that never knew positive feelings to have to deal with a whole bunch of them all at once is overwhelming. That person could push the people away at first with his character, even unbeknownst to him. But, eventually he learns to cope with his inner turmoil and becomes easier to deal with over time.
The second situation is known as true despair. It's very difficult for a person that has known love to embrace his loneliness. It can very easily turn to hate. This is the situation that gives rise to criminals. A person that is caught up in loneliness latches onto anything he can find, good or bad. The more he stays in solitude, the more he begins to despise other people that have what he doesn't: happiness. He becomes less and less sociable until eventually he either shuts everyone out or gets shut out by everyone. And being alone all of a sudden can lead down very dark paths.
Now, obviously, no one is totally alone. But most of us take others for granted. Like, in that last case, people will rarely take their family into account, considering that family is always there. Although others didn't even have that when they were young. Others don't have mothers, others have no fathers, and so on. But, if a person that grew up being loved and then ended up having that love taken away from him, he wouldn't stop to think about the people in his life. Just his own deprived-of-love self. But, if someone that had known little love in his life and ended up losing it, he would consider the rest of the people in his life, so that they don't go through what he went through.
I'm not sure if I'm making a whole lot of sense here, but what my point is, with the way things are in this day and age, love is doing more damage than good. Spoiling people, smothering them, then making them depressed and even bad. People that never experienced a lot of love are better off in the long run since they have less emotional attachments and are more focused on their goals. And despite how awful it sounds, without love there would be better people.
No comments:
Post a Comment