Looking at my blog, I realized I haven't actually posted any social-related article for a while now. And that's probably for good reason, I mean I'm always psyched about video games and sports, plus I had this move to Melbourne going for a while now, so I haven't really had much time to sit down and think of such an issue. Or to be more precise, nothing like that had come up. I thought I had pretty much analyzed everything that could be analyzed regarding social behaviors, but recently there's been something on my mind that I would like to address.
Considering this is my "big move" and I'm now on my own, I had been told from multiple different sources that I would be forced to "grow up". That I would have to "mature". That this would occur naturally, without me putting a lot of thought into it. It's just a process that we all go through at some stage in our lives. However, I have been pondering about what it truly means for a person to be "mature". Is it something that happens to us, like how we grow teeth, or is it just some pretentious term that we randomly came up with?
For a while I thought being "mature" meant outgrowing your own interests and gaining different, more sophisticated ones. However, that would require an entire change of character. And that doesn't happen. Once a person finds the things they've set their heart on, it's difficult for them to let them go, they have a connection with them. Maybe up until their late 20's does a person stay open to new and different things. Once they enter their 30's, it's hard for them to get into anything new. So it would be hypocritical for someone to do that.
Another use for the term (emotional) "maturity" would be to behave, as they say, more your age. More adult-like. To be someone who the title of "Mister" can be tied to. To dress more your age. Less T-shirts with funny characters or cheeky messages on them, more collar shirts and black ties. But who defines what you can behave as, be called or wear?? At the end of the day, we live in a society that allows freedom now more than ever! If a person is accepted based on their sexual orientation and race, then why should they be judged if they're 30+ and wanna wear T-shirts and talk slang (as long as they're not being offensive)?
One more possible explanation for this term could be that you're finally capable of taking care of yourself. But honestly, if you're over 20 and you can't even do that, then in this humble blogger's opinion, you won't survive for long in the real world. Do what you want, act how you want, be however you want, but be capable of standing on your own two feet. Don't ask for help for every little thing cause based on experience, help ain't never gonna come! Or it might but only when it's convenient for them. It's preferable that you be the one others turn to for help. So in terms of that, I don't really consider it being "mature" if you can take care of yourself, I just think it's common sense.
A last use for the phrase "emotional maturity" could be just as simple as that: for you to be able to cope with your emotions, a.k.a. your feelings. This is a process that actually could take a lot of years and experience, so yes, you could call it "maturing". Learning to properly deal with certain emotions that you were bad with before, handling people and situations better, becoming stronger as a person throughout previous experiences... that could be what it truly means to mature. To use all the events of your past as feedback, find your mistakes during those events and not repeat them. Not everyone's perfect however and we may stumble upon the way, but the idea here is to make an imprint in your mind of those times where you made the biggest mistakes so that you don't find yourself in a similar situation ever again. That's quite possibly the best meaning behind "emotional maturity".
At the end of the day, however one decides to use the term "mature", it is up to the individual how they will accept it. There could be the pretentious maturity, that is only existent for the eye of the beholders and vanishes behind closed doors, and then there's true maturity, that can be seen behind every word and action a person takes, even if said person wishes to act a bit more cheerfully and less appropriately for his age. That could also be taken as proof of maturity since it shows self-confidence. It is up to us what we determine as mature and what type of people we want to surround ourselves with.
Considering this is my "big move" and I'm now on my own, I had been told from multiple different sources that I would be forced to "grow up". That I would have to "mature". That this would occur naturally, without me putting a lot of thought into it. It's just a process that we all go through at some stage in our lives. However, I have been pondering about what it truly means for a person to be "mature". Is it something that happens to us, like how we grow teeth, or is it just some pretentious term that we randomly came up with?
For a while I thought being "mature" meant outgrowing your own interests and gaining different, more sophisticated ones. However, that would require an entire change of character. And that doesn't happen. Once a person finds the things they've set their heart on, it's difficult for them to let them go, they have a connection with them. Maybe up until their late 20's does a person stay open to new and different things. Once they enter their 30's, it's hard for them to get into anything new. So it would be hypocritical for someone to do that.
Another use for the term (emotional) "maturity" would be to behave, as they say, more your age. More adult-like. To be someone who the title of "Mister" can be tied to. To dress more your age. Less T-shirts with funny characters or cheeky messages on them, more collar shirts and black ties. But who defines what you can behave as, be called or wear?? At the end of the day, we live in a society that allows freedom now more than ever! If a person is accepted based on their sexual orientation and race, then why should they be judged if they're 30+ and wanna wear T-shirts and talk slang (as long as they're not being offensive)?
One more possible explanation for this term could be that you're finally capable of taking care of yourself. But honestly, if you're over 20 and you can't even do that, then in this humble blogger's opinion, you won't survive for long in the real world. Do what you want, act how you want, be however you want, but be capable of standing on your own two feet. Don't ask for help for every little thing cause based on experience, help ain't never gonna come! Or it might but only when it's convenient for them. It's preferable that you be the one others turn to for help. So in terms of that, I don't really consider it being "mature" if you can take care of yourself, I just think it's common sense.
A last use for the phrase "emotional maturity" could be just as simple as that: for you to be able to cope with your emotions, a.k.a. your feelings. This is a process that actually could take a lot of years and experience, so yes, you could call it "maturing". Learning to properly deal with certain emotions that you were bad with before, handling people and situations better, becoming stronger as a person throughout previous experiences... that could be what it truly means to mature. To use all the events of your past as feedback, find your mistakes during those events and not repeat them. Not everyone's perfect however and we may stumble upon the way, but the idea here is to make an imprint in your mind of those times where you made the biggest mistakes so that you don't find yourself in a similar situation ever again. That's quite possibly the best meaning behind "emotional maturity".
At the end of the day, however one decides to use the term "mature", it is up to the individual how they will accept it. There could be the pretentious maturity, that is only existent for the eye of the beholders and vanishes behind closed doors, and then there's true maturity, that can be seen behind every word and action a person takes, even if said person wishes to act a bit more cheerfully and less appropriately for his age. That could also be taken as proof of maturity since it shows self-confidence. It is up to us what we determine as mature and what type of people we want to surround ourselves with.
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